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Always a Fraudster, Never a Pro
Will Imposter Syndrome Ever Fade?
I waited weeks and weeks for my acceptance letter to grad school. I was so sure I wouldn’t get in to the elite school I had chosen, that finally I mailed in my application to a far less prestigious, smaller local college graduate program. That very same day, my acceptance arrived in the mail. I still thought it was probably a mistake.
Throughout my semesters of my master’s program, I thought surely everyone there was more equipped than I was, and that I’d somehow slipped through the cracks.
When I was offered a great job at a tech company, I was positive I was in over my head. It was just a matter of time before they understood that I had no business being there. I made a few missteps here and there, but I was promoted after the first year, given a substantial raise, and things went really well. I was pleasantly surprised.
Soon, people came to me for answers; they looked to me as not just a colleague but as someone knowledgeable in the field. I was floored. I still felt as though I knew so little.
The feeling that I was an imposter faded very little year after year. Each time I made even a small mistake, I felt like I slid back to square one as the new kid on the block, a fresh-out-of college newbie with so much to learn.
