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Healthy Boundaries, Happier You
Preserve Your Space to Preserve Your Sanity
I’ve not always been good at setting healthy parameters in my life. I think many of us are the same. Sometimes, I’ve allowed managers or bosses to email me on the weekends, even when I find it intrusive. For quite a while, I allowed my ex to change plans with the kids last-minute, overstepping and squashing plans I had made just because I knew he was a busy guy and bad at planning. I let coworkers encroach on my time by asking me to take on tasks that were not really my domain because I wanted to be helpful, and sometimes I let friends cancel at the last minute, or my kids shift plans unexpectedly and said, “it’s no big deal,” when it kind of was. But don’t we all do this? At least some of the time, yes, we do.
However, a lot of stress comes from tolerating other people’s behaviors year after year or time after time when we know we shouldn’t or when it makes us unhappy. Doing the occasional extra heavy lifting is one thing. Doing it on the regular is bound to grow or deepen resentments and foster unhappiness.
While we know that good boundary-setting builds better relationships with other people, often we don’t take steps to reckon that healthy boundaries leads to healthier, happier selves.
I’ve been thinking about this a bit as I watch my daughter, especially, navigate…