Suffice it to say - I stayed with him for 20 years, and not one of those years did we have enough money to get by (according to him). Now, I've been divorced for 5, and I seem to do just fine, but he still struggles to pay his own bills, although thanks to COVID, two of our nearly-grown (college-age) kids live with me.

So while I did my best back then to try to help budget, it's obvious it was a "him" problem, and not a "me" thing.