Thank you, Cosette. Wise words indeed. My son is not ADHD, but he is an alcoholic. So I take that into consideration with my sorrow. Even when he is not drinking, that is part of his disease. I will watch with great sadness as he squanders a great opportunity, but I will also have to be there to lend a hand when he has failed - again and again - to be the responsible adult I wish he could be. Because he is simply not capable, at least not until he has better treatment, better therapy, and perhaps even better medication. I like your choice of words "spectacularly fail" because it does in some ways hint at the shimmering potential underneath the surface.

Thank you for responding.