To Be Happy, Remove Unhappiness
I’ve been thinking about what it means to be happy. What it takes to make me happy. Me, specifically in this case because I already know that I am not responsible for anyone else’s happiness.
I’ve arrived at one simple thing: remove the unhappy.
Sounds glib, I know, but there’s some realness to it. I recognized that of course no one can be all happy all the time, but there are some relatively simple ways to move the happiness needle, at least for me.
When I separated from my husband in 2016, I had a lot of fear around being able to afford things. All things. It took me a long time to leave him because I couldn’t imagine being financially independent. I thought for sure I wouldn’t be able to pay for rent and food — at the same time — . My incredible therapist helped me debunk that mindset, but I knew I had to trim expenses. My ex had been a horrible money manager and we always seemed to come up short, so I assessed how to turn that around. The first, and most beneficial cut, was cable. It’s super popular now to “cut the cord,” but it wasn’t then. Hulu wasn’t a big thing, and Netflix dominated the scene, but I readily rid myself of the bill he was paying, over $150 per month for cable.
The payoff, though, was that I had no instant access to news.
