Both Fell Apart, and for the Same Reasons. No One Took Care of Them.
In 2000, as I was expecting our third child, my (now ex) husband and I bought a house. A vast brick home in Pittsburgh with what I believed was room to grow our family even larger. I had often spoken of creating a big family, having at least one more child to add to the three we’d soon have. And he had his eye on a gorgeous grand piano that would fill one of the big rooms on the first floor. …
And Other Horrifying Things She Said
At 10pm, when his 25 year old son says he needs to talk to his dad:
“You shouldn’t bother him right now. He’s had a long day.”
In a text message to his 23 year old daughter:
“You’ll probably laugh on his grave. You are so ungrateful.”
In a text message, referencing again some perceived slight:
“Your father provided everything. He took in your mother and your older brother and gave them a home when they had nothing. And look how you treat him.”
Ten minutes into dinner, the first time they visit in…
Doesn’t Everyone? You Ought To.
There’s the movie screen variation: the meet-cute, the romantic dates, the charming, funny stuff that happens, and then the resolution in a culminating long-term relationship. It’s steadfast.
I get stuck somewhere around the meet-cute and the dates part.
It’s nearly paralyzing, actually.
I have thought back to how dating was when I was a teenager or college student. It seems to me it was vastly different. I recall one specific scenario, when there was a cute boy in my Econ class in high school. He had been at my school all along, it’s just that…
It Didn’t Take Two for This Tango
In my late teens and early twenties, I thought — no, truly believed — that the path to happiness was walked hand in hand with a partner. It seemed that all the happiest people I knew were part of a duo. The least happy people in my orbit were single people, specifically single women because there seemed always to be looking for their ‘other person.’
So I was happy when I met a guy who was witty and fun, good looking and interested in me. He was a good friend, too. He was…
And Here I Am, Still Single
If you are not in the know, “cuffing season” is that pseudo-autumn time period where humans (apparently) feel something of a pull to emotionally and physically connect themselves to another human, in time for the chilly fall and winter ahead. It’s akin to “sweater weather,” but may involve less clothing, if all goes well.
The weather here in Baltimore has most certainly not turned crisp, and not…
Things About Owning Your Own Flathead and Owning Your Own Skillset
I bought a house in July, 2020. All by myself, as a grown-up single woman teetering on turning 50, I bought a house of my own.
Before that, I’d only lived in a house that I sort-of co-owned with my (now ex) husband. I say sort-of because although we lived in our last home for 20 years, since he was the breadwinner for quite a few of those, and even with funds from a joint checking account, he paid the mortgage; he considered it his house.
So in July…
I’m Giving One to All of My Children. Because I Love Them Too Much Not To.
Cue the sound of a record scratch.
The best engagement gift? But don’t you want your kids to be in the ‘happily ever after’ category?
Yes. Yes I do. I most assuredly do. I hope more than anything that when…if…my children find their person, that the person is their forever person. I sincerely hope that with all my heart. And yet I know that the odds are not, pardon the Hunger Games here, “forever in their favor.”
So when they are deeply, madly…
Or, Not Letting Disappointment Harsh Your Mellow
If you are a human, you will inevitably face disappointment and frustration, that’s just a simple fact. Whether you let it derail you is less a fact and more a choice.
Have you noticed the people in your life who are completely rattled when things go awry compared with the people who roll with it, and simply shift gears? It’s not that difficult to be the second type of person if you identify the ways to do it. That is, of course, if you prefer leading a less chaotic and more zen-like life…
Winkey Smile, Poo, and Clap Hands — Just Stop
As the saying goes, you never get a second chance to make a first impression. That is, unless you make an impression over and over by repeating the same behaviors that, if used one time are perhaps excusable but if used multiple times, are just ridiculous.
I give you the work email emoji.
In truth, even if it’s used one time, it’s pretty ridiculous, but it can be forgivable (sometimes)in peer-to-peer communications aimed at truly clarifying what is otherwise difficult to parse in quickly written prose.
Are You Up To The Task?
So. Many. Men. Unabashedly say they want a strong woman, a capable woman, a successful woman. But then, when they date one, or even look at the online dating profile of one, it appears they just aren’t sure what to do.
Men appear to be much more prepared to date a woman who is unsure of herself, who is a bit...dare I say…needy? And I find this to be really, truly, funny because (as a woman who has maintained an online dating profile for an unenviable amount of time now), a super-high number of…